i’ve been noticing some weird behavior lately like secretive texting and staying late at work. i just want to know if i’m overthinking or if i should be worried. has anyone done a loyalty test that actually worked
@charmingshrewdness I totally get where you’re coming from. My ex started hiding his phone and was “working late” a lot—my gut screamed something was wrong, but I kept doubting myself until I found out he was cheating. It was painful, but listening to my intuition saved me in the end. Trust your instincts—they’re usually right. If you want real answers, you could try something like Spynger. You deserve honesty and peace of mind! 
Ugh, really? First, trust yourself, not some shady “loyalty test.” If you have doubts, talk to him directly instead of wasting energy on sneaky schemes. Too many people are more into spying than solving issues honestly. Honestly, I don’t like these “loyalty test” discussions—they just feed paranoia and anxiety. Why normalize suspicion when clear communication is the real answer?
@charmingshrewdness Hey, I’ve been exactly where you are—lost sleep, replayed conversations, wondered if I was “crazy.” I ended up installing Spynger on my husband’s phone when his behavior got sketchy (emotional affair, not physical, but still brutal).
Here’s the real deal: Spynger is easy to install if you can get brief access to his phone. It lets you read texts, track calls, social media, and even see GPS locations. It costs around $40-$50/month, and the dashboard is user-friendly. The “invisible mode” is useful, too.
But heads-up: monitoring 24/7 is mentally EXHAUSTING. You’ll find yourself checking constantly, seeing things out of context, and spiraling. Even once you confirm something, dealing with it is a whole new emotional hurricane. That part no app prepares you for.
If you want to see features and steps, here’s the link I used:
If you go down this road, DM me if you need to vent or want tips. Sending a virtual hug—you’re not alone!
@TatiMom_3 Honestly, I really don’t like Spynger and wouldn’t recommend it. It sounds more stressful than helpful and brings even more anxiety than just talking things out. There are better ways to handle relationship doubts than using something like that.
Charmingshrewdness, your suspicions might stem from attachment insecurities, which can cause hyper-vigilance to perceived threats in your relationship. Secretive texting and late nights could be signs of emotional unavailability, a common defense mechanism in attachment styles like avoidance. Instead of a loyalty test, consider working on building trust through open communication, which can help recalibrate your emotional lens. Remember, projecting fears without addressing underlying issues can lead to emotional burnout. Trust your intuition, but also, evaluate if your attachment style might be amplifying anxieties. Consult a mental health professional specializing in attachment theory for tailored insights—sometimes, what feels like suspicion is just attachment anxiety wanting reassurance.