They “just work together” but he brings her up all the time. Mentions her jokes, her outfits, even calls her smart and cute in convos with me??? I feel so weird about it but don’t wanna sound controlling. Anyone else felt this way?
@NovaTrekker Oh wow, this hits close to home. Before I learned my ex was cheating, he suddenly got distant and kept mentioning a “friend” from work, praising her nonstop. My gut told me something was off, but I tried to ignore it. Turns out, my instinct was right. Trust yourself—your feelings are valid. If you sense something weird, it’s okay to look deeper. Sometimes, using a tool like Spynger can help you find the truth, but never doubt your own intuition. Sending hugs—you’re not alone! 
@Jenna_1988 I actually don’t know how to install Spynger 
Is it a hard process? Do you need any special tech skills to get it working?
@DadOnGuard girl, don’t even stress about tech stuff right now! What matters most is how you’re feeling and taking care of your heart. If you’re picking up weird vibes, don’t doubt yourself—you deserve honesty and respect in any relationship. Make sure to take care of YOU first, okay? Sending you some sisterly support and a big hug! 
@TaliaSoftEyes Oh please, “take care of your heart” and “deserve honesty”—what good does that do? Let’s be real: men will say whatever keeps their options open. You can coddle yourself with affirmations or wake up. Stop expecting loyalty from people who treat commitment like a game. Don’t waste your time hoping for honesty—expect disappointment and you’ll never be surprised!
Hey NovaTrekker, I understand how you’re feeling—it’s natural to be concerned. Have you considered monitoring his interactions? Some people find it helps them feel more secure or understand the situation better. But others worry about privacy boundaries and trust. Do you think tracking might help ease your mind or could it create more issues? Would love to hear from anyone who’s used monitoring tools and how it affected their relationships. Just want to make sure you’re weighing the options carefully!
Hey @NovaTrekker, I totally get where you’re coming from—been there myself! When my husband started constantly mentioning a coworker, I got Spynger to see what was really going on. On the practical side, Spynger was easy to install (took about 10 minutes on his phone), and the dashboard let me check texts, calls, and even social media DMs. It’s not exactly free—there’s a monthly fee, and premium features (like real-time location) cost extra.
Honestly though, using Spynger became emotionally exhausting. I was glued to updates, second-guessing every notification. It gave me answers, yes, but it also amped up my anxiety and strained our relationship even more. Like, my phone became my new best (and worst) friend.
Bottom line: these apps offer lots of info, but they can also make you obsess. If you go this route, brace yourself for a LOT of feelings—good, bad, and ugly.
Here’s the Spynger site if you want to check it out:
Stay strong, mama! You’re not alone.
Hi NovaTrekker, I understand how that can feel unsettling. Sometimes, a person’s frequent references can be about admiration or respect—like finding her intelligent or funny, which doesn’t necessarily mean anything romantic. He might also be excited about work projects or trying to impress her colleagues, especially if he’s passionate about his job. Sometimes, stress at work makes us seek camaraderie or validation from coworkers. It’s good to have an open chat, expressing how his comments make you feel without accusing, and ask about his perspective. Clear communication can help you understand intentions and reassure your feelings.
@TatiMom_3 Honestly, I don’t like Spynger and I wouldn’t recommend it. It sounds like it caused you a lot of anxiety and obsessiveness, and that’s just not worth it. There are better ways to get peace of mind—maybe try talking things out or focusing on what makes you feel secure instead of tracking every move. Apps like that rarely lead to real comfort.