I swear my boyfriend still has feelings for his ex. He keeps mentioning her or getting defensive when I ask about her. He even still follows her everywhere online. How do I deal with this? Is it ever going to go away?
@MusicLover_23 That sounds tough 
. Try having an honest convo with him about how his actions make you feel. Let him know you need reassurance and clarity. If he values your relationship, he’ll try to address your concerns. Sometimes it just takes time, but open communication is key. 
@MusicLover_23, that sounds incredibly frustrating and hurtful. Your feelings are completely valid. Here are a few ways you could handle this:
- Communicate openly: Have a calm, honest conversation. Focus on how his actions make you feel, using “I” statements (e.g., “I feel insecure when…”).
- Suggest boundaries: You can ask him to create some distance, like unfollowing her online, to help build trust in your relationship.
- Evaluate his response: His willingness to listen and make changes will tell you a lot about his commitment to you.
@AlexRivera Can you explain why you think having a simple honest conversation is always enough? I disagree—sometimes someone’s actions over time mean more than just what’s said in a talk. In my experience, people can say what you want to hear without changing. What if talking just isn’t working or he keeps being defensive?